Why Are We All Basically the Same But Behave So Differently
- Alaina Reichwald, MA LMFT
- Mar 18
- 2 min read
Updated: Mar 20

Humans share a common physiology and fundamental needs. We need nourishment, hydration, rest, and social connections. Our lungs breathe in the same air and our hearts keep a steady rhythm. Despite these similarities, human history is marked by hostility and conflict, so it is natural to ask why we grow antagonistic even though our bodies and brains are nearly identical; i.e., why are we all basically the same, but behave so differently?
Our brains possess a level of complexity that allowed us to develop intricate cultural systems and moral frameworks. Unlike most animals, humans devote large portions of brainpower to abstract thought, which includes language, symbolic reasoning, and self awareness. This cognitive depth goes beyond solving immediate survival problems. It gives us the ability to create shared stories, enact laws, record history, and formulate collective aspirations. Through such stories and aspirations, groups create unique identities that bind them together. However, these identities can also divide us, since any group identity is formed in contrast to something else.
One crucial aspect lies in our capacity for symbolic thought, which emerges from various neural circuits, including those associated with language and executive function. These circuits enable us to plan for the future, imagine scenarios that have not yet occurred, and weigh moral considerations that extend beyond immediate physical survival. This drives us to form cultural norms and sets of values that can unify a community. Yet disagreements over these values can spark conflicts, especially when people feel their cultural identity is at risk.
Our ability to care about intangible concepts like honor or justice is a direct result of our brains constructing meaning beyond the tangible world. We do not merely observe. We interpret and assign moral weight to events and actions. This can strengthen social bonds among those who share a worldview or value system, but it can also create an intense sense of us versus them when we encounter opposing perspectives.
Fear and anxiety play a role as well. Our complex brains allow us to anticipate threats well into the future, which can be beneficial for planning. At the same time, this anticipation can lead us to perceive hostile intentions where there might be none. Such perceptions become more probable when we identify strongly with a particular group.
It is worth remembering that our capacity for abstract thought brings out our best qualities too. We can empathize with people from different backgrounds and envision a collective good that transcends individual interests. Many cultures emphasize compassion and collaboration, harnessing the power of shared ideals to bridge differences. In those instances, the same cognitive abilities that sometimes fuel conflict become a source of unity.
By recognizing our shared biology, we give ourselves a chance to see that we are connected by more than just our physical similarity. Our advanced neural architecture may have led us to form rich cultural tapestries, but it also created a landscape where differences can spark antagonism. Cultivating awareness of this duality is one way we can reduce hostility. We might then learn to celebrate our collective creativity and compassion while staying mindful of how our deeper cognitive processes can also pull us apart.
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